From a friend of the Collective: Square Eyes, mostly movie reviews from a guy who sees a lot of movies (his slogan appears to be "I’m gonna watch it anyway. I’m sick like that. Why not let me tell you if it sucked?"). Rumor has it the blog will be moving away from TypePad at some point. The reviewer is more forgiving than I am (we’ve gone a number of rounds on how I shouldn’t have expected Spider-Man to do anything other than sit on my chest and poke me in the eyes), but the reviews are entertaining even if his threshold for suckage is different from mine.

I don’t know if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but I’m happy that geeks can consume more than Mountain Dew when chained to the computer.

Update: Turns out that I’m an April Fool. But I am pleased to live in a world where the reality and the parody of technology look so similar.

Remember that episode of Seinfeld when George pretended to be blind to get his books read for him? You won’t feel as guilty if you just listen to the archives of the Radio Information Service. Hear rank amateurs give it a go on some of the programs at the Alabama Print Information Center. Google has other listings as well.

And if you want to give back, you can do that, too. Check your local United Way for details.

We here at FP are in scarce company in our dislike of the first Spider-Man movie. I was optimistic about the second one when I learned that Gough and Millar (of Smallville) were writing it. Then I saw Birds of Prey and subsequent seasons of Smallville, and I was no longer so optimistic. But now I’ve seen the trailer for SM2 (return of the restraints), and damn it if I’m not optimistic again..

Catch The Darkness’s video for “I Believe in a Thing Called Love” while you can (eventually it will become a clip with an ad on the end) and catch a glimpse of the soul of rock. Or should I say FUCKIN’ ROCK!!!!!!!!! Their band bio mentions them opening for actual “serious” rock acts. If you were an arena rock staple, would you be brave enough to have The Darkness come on first?

Again, the incomparable Angie B. has issued her top tens for the year 2003.

Top Ten Teen Books for Teens:
A Northern Light by Jennifer Donnelly
The Wolves in the Walls by Neil Gaiman
Fat Kid Rules the World by K.L. Going
The Canning Season by Polly Horvath
Target by Kathleen Jeffrie Johnson
Boy Meets Boy by David Levithan
East by Edith Pattou
The Wee Free Men by Terry Pratchett
33 Snowfish by Adam Rapp
Milkweed by Jerry Spinelli

Top Ten Adult Books for Teens:
Wonder When You’ll Miss Me by Amanda Davis
All My Life for Sale by John Freyer
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime by Mark Haddon
Across the Nightingale Floor and Grass for His Pillow by Lian Hearn
Burndive by Karin Lowachee
The Usual Rules by Joyce Maynard
Fluke, or I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings by Christopher Moore
Brave Enemies by Robert Morgan
Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi
Blankets by Craig Thompson

In a table strangely reminiscent of the infant mortality data, more people die in fires in the south. What the heck are they doing down there? Should Neil Young write another song?

Who doesn’t love a good 404 message?

Had a bit too much to drink, and now you’re a bit peckish? Don’t leave that burner on too long. I’ll have to ask my fireman co-workers if this ever happens in the states; it seems so unlikely, since we Americans don’t cook.

Instead of forwarding that joke to all your friends, do as The Collective does: post it on your blog.
The disadvantage of this is that you can check your blog’s server logs and find out that almost nobody is reading your brilliant content. The advantage is that your friends might start actually reading the mail you send them.
FP does thank our loyal readership; we’d still be doing it just for us, but we’re happy that a few other people out there find it worth their time to stop by once in a while.